If you're feeling isolated, it's time to get reconnected with your people.
Trying to conceive is often described as a private journey, but the truth is your community, your village plays a huge role in supporting your pregnancy success. Feeling connected, cared for, and seen by others isn’t just emotionally helpful.
Research shows social support can actually influence fertility outcomes, reduce stress, and improve both partners’ well-being.
The Power of Connection
Loneliness and isolation can magnify the pressures of trying to conceive. When you have people around you who listen, encourage, and back you up, it’s easier to navigate setbacks and daily stress.
Studies reveal that women who report strong social support experience lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol, which is directly linked to healthier ovulation and improved chances of conception.
Supportive relationships also provide practical help, whether that’s sharing healthy recipes, carpooling to appointments, or simply offering a listening ear on tough days. Partners often benefit too, since connection reduces the tendency to internalize blame or pressure.
Research at a Glance
• Women in an IVF mind–body group (which included relaxation and peer support) had pregnancy rates around 52% vs. 20% in the control group. (Domar et al., Fertility and Sterility, 2011)
• Multiple meta-analyses show that low social support is strongly linked to higher depression and anxiety during pregnancy. (Bedaso et al., 2021; Tilahune et al., 2022)
• In pregnant women, good social support buffers the effect of psychological distress on cortisol, the main stress hormone. (Giesbrecht et al., 2013)
If Your Current Circle Doesn’t Get It
So now we know that a strong social support system is vital to your mental health, you may feel lost on how to build a the support you need. If you’ve ever thought, “My friends just don’t understand,” you’re not alone. Many people trying to conceive feel out of sync with their usual circle—especially if others are getting pregnant easily or don’t know what to say.
A few truths to hold onto:
Caring doesn’t always equal understanding.
Some people love you deeply but feel awkward, scared, or unsure how to show up. Their silence or clumsy comments often come from discomfort, not a lack of care.It’s okay to have “layers” of your village.
You might have one or two people you share the raw details with, a few friends who are great for laughs and distraction, and others you keep at a distance on this topic. All of those roles are valid.You’re allowed to look outside your usual circle.
Support doesn’t have to come only from long-time friends or family. Support groups, online communities, therapists, coaches, or others on a similar path can sometimes understand you more deeply than people who’ve never been there.You don’t have to keep explaining yourself to everyone.
It’s okay to say, “I don’t have the energy to talk about this right now,” or to change the subject. Protecting your emotional energy is part of taking care of yourself.
If your current circle can’t fully meet you where you are, it doesn’t mean you’re too much or too sensitive. It simply means it’s time to gently widen your village, to include people who can listen, validate, and walk with you through this season.
Ways to Rebuild Your Village
If you’re feeling isolated, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to reconnect:
Reach out to trusted friends or family. Even a simple text or walk together can help break the sense of solitude.
Join a support group. Many communities and online platforms offer groups for people navigating fertility challenges. Shared experience can be incredibly comforting.
Lean into your healthcare team. Fertility clinics often have counselors or patient liaisons trained to offer emotional and practical support.
Invite your partner into open, honest conversations. Sharing how you feel can strengthen your bond and keep you both connected during the ups and downs.
Small Steps Have Big Impact
You don’t need a huge social circle to experience the benefits. Even one or two supportive relationships can make a meaningful difference to your mood, resilience, and even your fertility journey’s outcome.
